Whaddya Know?

Does anyone remember this show? Growing up near Madison, Wisconsin, Michael Feldman's Whaddya Know? was a staple of Saturday mornings (right before Prairie Home Companion). It was a quiz show recorded mostly in Madison (although the show did travel) and when I was 13, they had a contest called "Whaddya Know, The Next Generation." I knew that this was my calling. I recorded an audition tape, crosslegged on my bed, singing "I Enjoy Being a Girl" as well as declaring that "you should let me be the announcer because I could do this job better than any man."

Of course, they played the second part on national radio, after which Feldman quipped, "I guess they're starting to teach feminism in middle school now."

I won the contest, along with three other teenagers, and got to act as the announcer for the second half of a live show. Above is a particularly embarassing picture of me complete with glasses, braces, unruly hair, a homemade tie-dye seafoam green t-shirt, gray blazer, and dragon bell bottoms. Oh, and of course a novelty tie made out of fake cheese. At least I've finally grown out of that awkward phase...sigh...

I don't remember being particularly nervous--all of my stuff was written down--I didn't have to do stand-up like the new young host, Noah Putterman. Our repore wasn't as good as Michael and Jim Packard's, but I still think we did alright. I remember my mom had to correct me at home so I didn't stay Studs TerKEL on national radio.

I ended up with a fair amount of public radio bling. The Bocca Burger Barbeque Bundle (which is how I found out I dislike Bocca Burgers), a Feldman cd and book, and some other various posters and memorabilia.

I was sure it was the first stop on my way to international fame and stardom. I had just spent the past seven years in speech therapy getting rid of a heavy lisp and as soon as the braces were off, I obviously going to be ready for Hollywood. Would the move to Hollywood be hard on my parents? Of course, but they would get over it as soon as they didn't have to deal with the rough Midwestern winters. My mother would be too busy meeting with Gloria Steinem and other feminists, talking about my potential. And my dad would find a job as a consultant on disaster movies (a Ph.D. in Geology had to be good for something).

We would live in a modest mansion, say, 5 bedrooms and a guest house. Small pool, a cook, a driver and a maid, you know, just the basics...

Hmmm....my life may not have turned out exactly as my 13-year old self would have liked, but I hope that on some level I have not dissatisfied her completely. I was listening to Terry Gross interview Russell Brand and Quentin Tarantino (not at the same time) and was struck by how down to earth and intelligent both these gentlemen were. While at the same time being devious and a bit "off." It made me think about what they were like at 13. If they had the same aspirations of stardom as I did. If they had any idea how famous they would become. What it would be like if all our 13-year old selves would get along, collaborated on a home movie...ah, me...