On my drive south from Oak Harbor

I muse about the similarities between Whidbey

and the Midwest

I see WI stickers all the time and my heart

jumps

thinking "Oh, Wisconsin!"

then I realize Whidbey Island has the same initials

(the same mistake could be made with Oak Harbor and OHio...)

I see the pastures just north of Coupeville

with cows standing and sitting

(which one means it's going to rain?)

I am transported to Iowa and Minnesota

America's heartland

my heartland

and channeling Kilgore Trout,

I continue on my drive, thinking,

"If this isn't nice, what is?"

poem for max's b-day

if you drive far enough on Bayview Rd
(heading west)
it turns into Ewing Rd
and farmland (with cows)
I felt transported back to the midwest
(and Iowa)
and if you go far
far enough
there is a dilapidated (old, white) farmhouse
beauty in its decay

I think of you
when things are simultaneously
beautiful and ugly
wonderful and terrible

[whenever I flip over the coin
to see the other side]
heads or tails,
chances are
there's a hell of a
universe next door
to murder or create
(and hear the mermaids singing)


Let's go.

Trying to be Amelie...

When my best friend growing up, Julia, and I saw the movie Amelie, I think we were in high school. She recently reminded me that we had the intention of doing random acts of kindness to strangers, like leaving notes in people's lockers that said "you're awesome." We even bought a journal to log our exploits. But it never really took off. We had the right intentions but didn't follow through.

"Without you, today's emotions would be the scurf of yesterday's."

I was thinking lately about my high school and college selves, respectively, and how I wish I could travel back in time and shake them very hard and say "Stop worrying about what other people think of you. And stop wasting time on boys--it's really not worth it." But I seriously doubt my advice from the future would resonate.

I once had a friend who said something along the lines of "I hope that someday you will be able to live your life free of men and applause." At the time, this comment stung, but I think perhaps I have enough perspective now to appreciate it somewhat.

After all, it is better to help people than garden gnomes...

What do you do with a B.A....?

I was thinking about this the other day...there must be a ton of slightly subversive female 20-somethings from the Midwest who have graduated with their B.A.s in Theatre/Dance or Women's Studies or Ethnomusicology because they wanted to study what they really loved instead of being safe and studying to be a teacher like their families said they should. There is a gap between being a college co-ed and becoming Bridget Jones and I want to hear from this population because I consider myself one of them...

I've referenced the word "quirkyalone" before, and while I still identify with it, I'm not sure if it truly defines me. I think there needs to be another word...and dagnabbit, that might just be what I set my mind to doing this week...

We were going to change the world in college and now we're working mundane jobs to pay the rent. It's not that we've lost our idealism entirely...it's just not as easy to change the world when you're not in the petri dish of a liberal arts college setting with hundreds of other people with similar backgrounds and aspirations...

I'm the first to admit that I'm addicted to FaceBook--I can spend hours checking in on friends from high school and college and seeing what they're up to. Many are married and starting families...some are in grad school or even Ph.D. programs...and I fell a bit as though I'm in limbo...

Am very excited to get the new production company off the ground and create my own new artistic reality. It's grounding to be collaborating with people who are a bit older than me and have a different educational background...

So maybe that's what you do with a B.A. from a liberal arts school in northeastern Iowa...create your own reality....

Valentine's Poem for My Most Exhalted

My father is my favorite valentine.
(He never forgets--even when I do)

And when I find myself
lounging on the couch,
glass of wine in hand,
watching both Bridget Jones'
in rapid sucession,
I am reminded of my favorite valentine.

The one who never forgets,

the man who still holds
the largest piece of my heart.

Uncommon Characters

So, my friend Bristol and I are starting our own production company called Uncommon Characters. The website will be up at www.uncommoncharacters.com shortly...It's a very exciting endeavor and I can't wait to be official and stuff...look for further updates, coming soon!




Poem:



jude law throwing oranges



i know that jude law throws oranges. at
unsuspecting nyu first-year girls in the dorms
(their dorms face his apartment)
and he throws oranges at them
so that they'll stop waving

i know that natalie portman elbows people
inthestomach while waiting in line
for toastedcheeseandtomatosandwiches
at the university of jerusalem
i have it firsthand from my first boyfriend
(now an ex)

what is it with celebrities and violence surrounding food?

perhaps they use it
as a weapon
because they are denied
anythingthatpossibly
could taste good.